Dear Brothers and Sisters,
We try to think carefully before we talk, to make sure the listeners agree with us. Talking is an art – what to talk, when to talk, how to start the introduction, what is the main part, how to conclude, what kind of language to use – formal or informal, what clothes to wear, what to avoid mentioning… Everyone of us use many of these considerations when we talk to parent, teacher, friend, the bank, boss, customer, client… Talking is a very high art of advocacy.
But probably you all have experienced that whatever you try, it’s usually clumsy and uncomfortable and seems not working. You feel like all your trying has little effect and you could do a better job by not trying all those techniques.
Why?
The first reason is what when you have to worry about so many techniques at the same time, none of the techniques comes out well. Also, you can’t concentrate on the content of the talk.
The second reason is that regardless of how much you try to hide, if you are not sincere, your insincerity will show through for the world to see; all the external conversation techniques cannot hide it.
What does that mean to us?
It means that, firstly, your inner thinking and attitude will always be apparent for the world to see.
Secondly, therefore, you always want to make sure you have good thinking and good attitude about your conversational partner and the subject matter. Let your natural inner thinking and attitude present themselves in your aura. They will do the advocacy for you.
Thirdly, you focus 100% on conversation, and nothing else. That is every-minute Zen.
I often have many meetings – opposing counsel, CEO of a company to negotiate a contract… Before I walk into the meeting room, I always pray: “Father, the folks I am meeting today are my friends. My job is to support them to find a common solution. They are not my opponents and enemies. Please work with me and don’t let me go off track.” With that attitude, I negotiate very well in any setting.
Many people have said to me the first time they met me: “You have a very sincere and trustworthy look. You must be very successful.” I know that they were not flattering, because in my heart, I was very honest to them and respectful toward them.
Obviously, many people can read your aura.
So, if you’re smart, have the right heart, and let you heart and your aura do the advocacy each time you talk.
With compassion,
Hoành
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